For those who wondered, here it is.
1) Get car pimped out. Tires, brakes, whole enchilada. (DONE.)
2) Buy a crapload of non-perishable Trader Joe's snack food. (DONE.)
3) Drive to Seattle to pick up Joe (via Boston, Cleveland, Des Moines, and Eugene.) (DOING.)
4) Hop on Wood Brothers tour in Vancouver.
5) Play nine shows on said tour (Vancouver, Seattle, Portland, Eugene, Petlauma, San Francisco, Visalia, LA, San Diego).
6) Drop off Joe/pick up best bud (Kerry) in LA.
7) Drive back to Philadelphia via Albuquerque, Austin, New Orleans, and Knoxville.
Travel suggestions (places to eat/stay, stuff to see) welcome!